While growing up, I was lost, scared, and confused of who I was. Roughly two years ago, I remember sitting in one of my classes listening to my peers talk about what school activities they would like to join and other ways to be apart of the school. Although, I wanted to belong somewhere I didn't know which one was me. I sat there all puzzled and frightened. Time was passing by quickly and I couldn't control it. It was like I was running an endless marathon. I was caught in a battle of what I enjoyed and what I wanted. I felt hopeless, the fact that I couldn't figure myself out was devastating. With pressure of post-secondary careers, I was clueless of what I wanted to become. Like I've mentioned before, everything was happening way too fast. Resulting as the most toughest day of my life. Striving for good grades and achieving my goals, there was simply no direction as for where I wanted to go in my life. In my own words, I've struggled to be who I thought I was.
Prior to this year, I've discovered where I wanted to go in my life. I faced my demons of being an outsider and a confused teenager lurking down the halls. Into someone I could see myself become. I broke my shell of an outsider and joined dance. With dance as my break free from containment, this experience helped me understand myself better. Dance defined me as a leader. Somehow I grew some courage and included everyone as well as treated everyone as a team. As someone wise told me, "Once a team, always a team." Dance was also a great stress reliever towards school. Another characteristic I've come upon was that I am a risk taker. I loved to try new things and learn from them. For instance, I got the chance to learn how to fence and it was an absolute pleasure. Fencing opened my eyes and I realized that being competitive was healthy/normal thing to experience. Also, I learned that in order to be successful I needed to establish my strengths and weaknesses. As for fencing, I was great at my reflects but I lacked in timing. As of today, I would define myself as someone who wants to be a better person and build on from learning from their mistakes as well as growing to exceed a positive and meaningful life.
After graduating high school with good grades, I see myself on the path of my career as a nurse. While becoming more independent by getting a part-time job to pay off my loan that I've borrowed. Likewise trying to balance school and my job at the same time maintaining a healthy lifestyle by going to the gym and doing outdoor activities as much as possible. After four years, I would now be working at a hospital by the age of 21. Which leaves me, finally getting married in my late 20s and within that year my husband and I would purchase our first home with a great backyard for our two children. Whereas I would now work only as a part-time nurse to take care of my children.
An identity is more than your DNA and appearance. It is something you have to learn and search for as in finding your inner self. In order to truly know and understand yourself, you need to try new things and experience opportunities given to you. Take risks and believe, escape that mind of yours, which led me to I join dance that I happened to dearly enjoy. If it doesn't work out, build on from it and keep trying until you find what makes you happy. It may be hard at first to figure out who you are but, it doesn't hurt to try.
Sukhleen Bachra
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